?
I’d play the Nickelodeon theme song on repeat at 180 decibels for as long as the caller is on the line.
If they hang up, a voicemail will be sent to them that contains… you guessed it, the Nickelodeon theme song at 180 dB. It will be played only once in this case.
Truly what an ingenious way to fry your phone’s earpiece/speaker in addition to your ears and those of everyone around you within at least a kilometer of distance, all by listening to a too loud overamplified distorted rendition of those 5 notes known to be associated with Nickelodeon. I’d go to jail for causing such a disaster (both for “ear terrorism” AND copyright infringement).
Post about it on Lemmy
1-800-DRUIDIA
“Thank you for calling the U.S. nuclear arsenal command system. To launch nuclear missiles, press one. Para Español, marque dos.”
Just to screw with people more, “… Para Español, marque uno.”
Fire ze missiles!
But I am le tired!
Well, is it a vanity number or just a bunch of random digits?
Let’s say you have a 50/50 chance of getting your choice of a vanity number or a randomly assigned 800 number - what do you do in either outcome?
- Research the highest selling ever vanity number, consult with the largest vanity number holders, find out what the most expensive vanity number is.
- If I get it, sell it.
- If it’s random, ask a bunch of people on Lemmy what their ideas would be if that happened.
Two chicks at the same time.
My cousin broke, don’t do shit.
I get what kind of chicks would double-up on a dude with a million dollars, but I’m suddenly VERY curious about the kind of chicks that would do that for a dude with a 1-800 number.
Two chicks who call that number and independently report they’d be down for a completely anonymous FFM three-way - and follow through?
It could happen, life’s a weird thing, but there’s unicorns and then there’s this. If everyone leaves without a disease and with all their kidneys they should probably go buy lottery tickets.
Entrepreneurial ones, I guess. They hear about a magic bottomless phone line and see an arbitrage opportunity.
I would set up a BBS with lots of text based games on it.
But who has a modem to dial it these days?
I probably have an old laptop somewhere with a modem on it, but then my next impediment is I don’t have a landline any more.
Not a lot of people, but there are retrocomputing hobbists who’d probably be stoked to find something like this.
Apparently you can tunnel through using a VoIP device, but it’s not great. Or get a cellular modem (do not know what kind of connection quality you’d have in 2024, or if it’s even a real option).
The other option would be finding an old payphone that works with an acoustic coupler. See here (Wayback link as on my phone, direct one doesn’t seem to work on all browsers, fine in Firefox but host pretends the site doesn’t exist in my default one that opens in Jerboa*)
https://web.archive.org/web/20220520161806/http://wrybread.com/WryRoad/gadgets/coupler.htm
I am admittedly a giant dork, but a quest to try and find a payphone that still exists AND you could actually do this with sounds fun. Seeing someone sitting next to a payphone with a buncha wires and a computer would be some high weirdness I can get behind.
*Sidenote: Anyone know how to change the default brower Jerboa on Android uses?
Not use it, as much as I don’t use all my other numbers
Never answer it unless they texted me first.
Fart sounds
Well, I already have the power to announce stuff for free here by creating a community, so I guess I’d use it the same way I use Lemmy: telling people about free video games
Nobody uses the phone system anymore. It’s all app based voip calls now.
A 1800 number might be good for a business, maybe a bail bondsman
Wifi calling is voip, but regardless I’m glad the phone works for you.
Point I was trying to make it that I don’t believe this is true:
Nobody uses the phone system anymore.
Whenever I don’t have WiFi, we call each other too. Nobody’s counting minutes. Can talk for hours if we like. Just like with app calling. Why go through/install an app if the phone is right there. Especially if I can control it with my voice these days like “call mom”. 👌
