It’s already well known at work that I don’t just not like gore videos but that I hate them and actively avoid them.
A colleague sent me a video of a man being murdered by axe via WhatsApp to my personal phone on my lunch break. Before I opened it I asked if it was a video that I would want to see (because I know what sort of character he is), he implied it was fine.
Despite my suspicion I took his word and watched it. I immediately scolded him, he then made light of the situation, I told him that it wasn’t funny and that if it ever happened again I would be making a formal complaint immediately.
A couple of minutes later, another colleague came in to the mess room, the guy that sent the video made fun of me for not liking the video in front of them. I told him that he was making fun of me and that I wasn’t ok with that.
Do I have the right to not be sent murder videos? What would an employer do if I made a complaint?
From my understanding your colleague committed a crime under the Indecent Displays (Control) Act 1981 and you can refer the matter to the police - which I would strongly recommend as this is beyond an employee-employer relationship.
And it brings the employer into a position that the company is forced to make sure that the offender cannot reoffend against anyone (not just you). While the first offense is nothing the company can really be held liable for, anything after they have (officially) made aware they can be held liable for.
Block his WhatsApp ass.
pretty sure you can get him fired but going to police would be little too much (imo)
Naw people who are that dumb and cruel wont learn a thing unless its shoved in his face that what he did was fucked up.
The police won’t just issue a slap on the wrist though, he will be entered onto a database. This could potentially ruin their entire life.
If by database you mean in the criminal system, yeah i guess he would be. Thats the usual consequences of breaking the law. It wouldnt ruin his life though.
I think intent needs to be factored in. If the colleague’s intent was purely to terrorise then that should be punishable. If their intent was humour, albeit at the expense of OP, I think some leniency should be involved, at least until they understand the gravity of their offence.
We are all ignorant of the sensitivies of others in at least one degree, is my defense here.
Guarantee you wouldn’t be saying this if he was sharing CSAM.
Yes that’s illegal
Pretty sure forcing gore videos onto another person is also illegal.
its not like he put a gun to his head and forced him to watch it, also what do you even tell to the police? “officer this guy sent me a gore video and then made fun of me - arrest him!”
Can you cite the law?
In what world is sending gore videos to colleagues normal???
Not only that, but “it’s known that I don’t like gore videos” like it’s some common thing that comes up in conversation. I’ve worked at some raunchy “boys will be boys” type places and the worst we would do is surprise each other with some gay porn images or stuff like ‘two girls one cup.’
I mean, if that’s ok, it’s surely ok for OP to send the offending coworker random dick pics every day at lunch.
I’m opening myself here to be spammed but I’d much rather receive dick picks over snuff.
Yeah, but the guy that thinks sharing snuff films at work ok is likely to also be the kind of guy that is vehemently homophobic…and I mean the more scientific definition where exposure causes physical disgust or discomfort as opposed to the more political definition of just not viewing them as equals. I don’t think it’s a huge leap to assume this is the kind of person that would have the same visceral experience they shared with OP…especially if OP were to imply the massive, throbbing high definition photo was also actually gore.
Not exactly sending them to coworkers, but I did kind of refer a coworker to one once.
I work in 911 dispatch, it’s kind of hard not to end up a little desensitized to some crazy shit. We once had a call about some kind of industrial accident, someone’s arm caught in a machine or something along those lines. Obviously not going to share too many specific details about the incident, but we did have a teams on location ready to do a field amputation if needed, but luckily they were able to get the person out without any major injuries.
So our conversations tended to be about a lot of the crazy gory fucked up things we’d taken calls about or otherwise seen or heard about, and I mentioned the Russian lathe accident video to one of my coworkers (don’t look that up if you’re not the kind of fucked up who can deal with that sort of thing, it’s a guy getting caught in a heavy duty lathe and spun around and mashed against the machine until someone comes and hits the emergency stop, at which point there’s nothing much left of him)
That piqued her interest, and she went and watched it on her phone at her next break.
I wouldn’t send the video to anyone, especially not out of the blue, and when it comes up I warn people not to look it up if they’re the type of person who would be significantly disturbed by it. In general I won’t even mention it to people who don’t work either in some sort of emergency services or medical sort of field where we have to occasionally deal with that kind of thing, or in a machine shop where they’re working around those kinds of machines, and even then it’s something that only gets brought up to certain people in certain contexts.
That’s insane behavior. There is no situation where you should be sharing videos that contain murder to a work colleague. Even if someone asked I would still not send it to them.
I would hope you are covered by law because that behavior is universally unacceptable.
deleted by creator
What a complete and utter distasteful thing to do by your colleague. You do have the other colleague as witness, kind of. In some countries you can get legal advice for free. No idea whether that applies for the UK. Having said that your colleague appears to be seeking for attention, negative or not. You really should define your personal boundaries. However the question is whether ignoring the person and blocking their private number or filing a complaint is going to give them more attention and more reason to harass you. I would talk with a few good friends in real time about this so you can vent or cry or shout about this horrible event. Stay safe!
Another thing you can consider is to find a good mediator and then have a chat with your colleague to talk about your boundaries and about their motives. You got lots of down-votes for your reluctance to complain and have the colleague fired and that made me think that your colleague getting fired might make things worse. Who knows what more horrible things the person would do after that. Something more constructive must be possible.
deleted by creator
Yep work harassment. Not even a maybe.
If some edgelord employee sent a picture of a gun to someone with no context, HR will file it under threat. The edgelord won’t get in serious trouble, but would be warned about that since it’s vague and can be anything from showing their cool gun collection, to threatening to shoot.
Now a video of actual murder… You better believe thats harassment. No question about it. Immediate removal.
And as the comment above - if he’s sending that to you, he absolutely will be sending nasty shit to your other coworkers, especially to those who can’t speak up or are too afraid.
Not every job has an HR department. And it’s my understanding that HR is primarily to benefit the company. I’ve never worked for a company with an HR department so take that for what it’s worth.
You’re correct, the HR dept is there to protect the company. And the actions of the employee sending gore vids potentially harms the company. Thus, HR will protect the employee when it protects itself. Think how HR would step in if someone was sending porn. That would harm the company. HR would intervene.
They only don’t do shit when they can get away with it. Anything that a court would find absolutely objectionable (not maybe) will be curtailed.
Which is exactly why not having an HR dept is only detrimental for the company, not the employee. If the company doesn’t have an HR dept, they should consult a lawyer for a hostile work environment case. The lawyer will probably say he should first at least let his supervisor know, and if nothing is done, or if they retaliate, then they can show them why an HR dept is a good investment.
You’re correct, HR is there to benefit the company. However, in this case, the goals align. OP wants to stop being sent objectionable material while at work. HR wants employees’ actions to not open the company up for litigation. Being able to prove that dickhead is engaging textbook harassment while on the clock should be an open and shut case.
All of this is to be taken with a heaping handful of salt, since regulations differ wildly by jurisdiction, but this seems pretty clear cut to me.
This is exactly why HR departments exist. Had OP collected evidence, told management with a paper trail, and they failed to stop it? Or worse, told off OP because they don’t want to deal with it?
The jerk could maybe get charged with a misdemeanor related to harassment or misuse of technology… Maybe the UK has something harsher or more specific, but at the end of the day it’s a bit extreme to put someone in jail or pay OPs wages if they were forced out of work
The company on the other hand? They have a legal obligation to maintain a safe work environment. They also have deeper, easier to access pockets. A lot easier to get a lawyer to pursue that, which is expensive even if they win in the end
If they’re clearly shown to have not taken reasonable action, they’d at least be on the hook for any lost wages or medical costs (not sure what decent therapy runs over there, less than the US I’m sure but I’m guessing not cheap). Even if OP quits or decides not to show up, it could be until they get a new job at similar pay with some extra thrown on top
HR’s job is to cut this off before OP needs to be paid off, or much worse finds a lawyer. They don’t care about the employees, so safest could be to fire the guy - the least they’re going to do is officially reprimand the guy and follow up with OP to make sure it’s not worsening and OP isn’t feeling litigious
It’s already well known at work that I don’t just not like gore videos but that I hate them and actively avoid them.
What the FUCK is going on at your work? I know this isn’t always an option, but I suggest you run away. A workplace where you’re considered the weird one because you don’t like snuff vids? I really doubt a complaint could fix that environment, it sounds rotten to the core
If I knew who you were and what company you worked for, I’D report that to HR. If that ever happened at my office I’d fire the guy without even consulting HR. I’d confiscate his stuff and walk him out the door, HR can clean up the mess.
If there was one hint of retaliation by another employee, I’d fire them on the spot. If there is any hr or manager retaliation to you, you call a lawyer. You’ll be paid extremely well.
The situation you described is so black and white in your favor - your management and hr department should be quaking in their boots that you don’t sue.
Straight to HR - that fucker needs sacking. This is the very definition of bullying and harassment.
In the US and this sounds like a text book case of harassment and is illegal and absolutely should lead to termination of the offending party. I imagine the UK has stronger labor laws to protect workers, so uh, go to your HR department and whatever the local government labor board equivalent is. You should absolutely not put up with this shitty behavior from anyone.
I imagine the UK has stronger labor laws to protect workers
ahahahaha
no
in the UK you are basically ‘at will’ for the first two years of any job, you can be fired for no reason.
Most of the US is ‘at will’ forever for almost any job.
so basically no better than the UK but you get 3-4x the salary, and sometimes have to pay for healthcare?
(the NHS is fucked)
It’s just a video. You are making a big deal out of nothing.
Found the colleague
Found the snowflake
I agree, the video isn’t that big a deal. Not respecting boundaries in a work environment, on the other hand, is a very big deal, particularly since he knew he was violating their boundaries. I’ve stopped talking to people who didn’t respect my boundaries before, and those were friends, not coworkers. The fact you can’t recognize the underlying issue is probably something you should reflect on.
