Smores

All my savoury stuff tends to fall flat. But I am pretty good at baking. I made a bakewell tart recently and it was killer. Also bread. I make some pretty mean breads. Also, whilst I haven’t done it in a while, I used to make cheese, specifically soft rind cheeses like camembert. Not east to prepare, takes about 8 weeks, but very impressive.

One more, homemade pasta. Whilst I don’t really think homemade pasta tastes any better than store bought, people do find it impressive. And a pasta roller is pretty cheap.

Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a glare. If you have to work on the glare, go watch Clint Eastwood in The Outlaw Josie Wales.

Babish’s Panko Crusted Salmon.

It’s stupid easy & relatively quick. The hardest part for me was the egg white. Had never done it before.

If you’ve never done it before, & break the yolk on the first try… don’t dump the egg, just save it for breakfast. Yes, I dumped the egg.

Link to video, I think it’s the second dish, towards the middle.

Link to recipe is in the video description.

Edit: PipedBot shamed me.Link to recipe if you don’t want to go to YouTube.

These are super simple, take under 20 minutes, and people love them.

For a dinner: Baked salmon with lemon, butter, garlic and dill. Saute some spinach on the side. For a lunch: Sandwich. Crusty baguette, a soft cheese of some sort, slices of green apples. Maybe a cured meat like prosciutto if you are feeling that. Takes no time at all to make but feels fancy. For a breakfast: Oatmeal with guava paste. It turns pink which is fun, then toast some slivered almonds in a bit of butter and server them hot on top.

Japanese curry is both easy and a crowd pleaser. I saute whatever veggies I have on hand and just add curry mix and water to it (S&B medium spice is my go to brand). Serve with flatbread or rice. It’s very forgiving and customizable to personal taste.

Mostly depends on the culture / palate of your guest. What I’d make for for someone who mostly eats takeout is quite different from what I’d make for someone that only eats Ramen and Kraft dinner.

Most likely I’d just make macaroni salad or macaroni casserole though, because everyone likes that.

I asked my mom for the family recipe, to use as an example in case you’ve never had it.

Cook some macaroni noodles and then cool it under running water. Cube cheese, ham, pickles. Hard boil a couple of eggs. I like them smashed to a paste and mixed in with the salad, but my family just has them as a side dish. Mix all ingredients together in a large bowl with Miracle whip and seasoning salt.

If you want, you can make it a casserole by skipping the pickles + eggs, adding a cup of shredded cheese, and mixing it all together with a can of condensed tomatoe soup. Then bake it in a casserole dish until all the cheese melts.

Hoisin chicken. Adapted from a recipe I’ve not been able to find. Super easy, very few ingredients, ingredients are generally easy to find, and it’s super quick to make. Doesn’t make a huge mess, either. Goes well with simple rice and veg.

Ingredients:

• Chicken of choice (thigh is best, can substitute breast though haven’t tried), diced into small chunks (three quarter- to one-inch)
• Hoisin sauce
• Garlic, minced finely
• Ginger, minced finely (I’m usually lazy and use prepared ginger paste from the store)
• Red pepper flakes (optional)
• Salt, to taste (I omit, as I find the hoisin sauce plenty salty)
• Pepper, to taste (I recommend white pepper, though black pepper can be used)
• Neutral oil, like vegetable

Instructions:

Note: you may need to work in smaller batches. Don’t crowd the pan.

1. At med-high to high heat, quickly cook the chicken in the pan using a bit of oil. Cook until nearly cooked through, but just barely under. Season while cooking with salt and pepper to taste.
   • Note: I like to add the red pepper flakes halfway through cooking the chicken to hydrate the flakes in the oil/juices, which helps bring out some extra flavour from the flakes, seasoning the chicken itself. This makes it a bit spicier though.
2. Push the chicken to the edges of the pan.
3. Put approx. 1 tsp (or to taste) each of garlic and ginger into the centre of the pan and very quickly saute until golden. Do not let them go over golden.
4. Pour in just enough hoisin to coat the chicken. Pour straight into the ginger and garlic, and mix well to form a sauce. Stir quickly for a few seconds, you’ll find the sauce thickens slightly at the high heat.
   • Note: if you didn’t add the red pepper flakes earlier to the chicken, you can add it now.
5. Toss the chicken into the sauce. You should have a light, but thorough, coating.

Repeat in batches for all remaining chicken.

Edit to add: apologize for no measurements. As a humble home food-maker (as if I’d call myself a home chef!) I truly have no clue how much I use of much of anything. Sorry, I tried. Cook as you like it. Like extra garlic? Add more. Don’t like garlic? Add only a little, or none. Hypertension? Don’t add salt. Not a part of the 21st-century hypertension epidemic? Add salt to your liking.

Pulled pork. It takes a long time to smoke, but requires minimal effort and hard to screw up.

Depends on the person you’re trying to impress. If the person is Caucasian then make something bland otherwise add some spices.

Beef Wellington with a red wine sauce, if I have money to blow. If not, either Mongolian Beef, Gumbo, or any number of other things, depending upon the person.

Pan-seared sea scallops.

The key here is to get good scallops which were flash frozen, NOT stored in liquid.

All you need is a good skillet, a hot flame, and several tablespoons of good quality butter.

Watch a bunch of videos for various techniques. My preferred method is just basting them in butter.

Don’t crowd the pan. Don’t burn the butter. Don’t overcook the scallops.

Master this dish and you will always have a last-minute gourmet option.

Serve with a mixed-green salad, grits, white wine.

Perfect for date night because it is classy, satisfying, decadent, but also light, and won’t stain your clothes if it you happen to have a slip.

Note: the quality of this dish 100% depends on the quality of the scallops.

Sometimes, even when you pay top dollar, you can get a batch that are really bland.

Good news is that generally you can get great frozen ones from Costco, and keep them in your freezer, ready to go.

If you have time, and a lot is riding on the meal, do a test scallop in advance to make sure it’s delicious. If it isn’t find a new plan.

Mussels. They are cheaper than clams, easy to cook, can taste just as good, and easy to make fancy.

My go-to approach is beef goulash, Austrian style. It’s a bit laborious (although the steps are easy), but the dish can (and should) be prepared in advance, then you prepare a simple potato mash as you get ready for the person.

Vegetarian guest? Seitan goulash tastes really good.

Max and cheese.

Without using the box instructions.