Ik the bar and club scene have women but it’s not likely to go anywhere plus one or both parties are drunk. Just curious to see what people think on the topic. The beach is a spot I’m trying to push myself to talk to women at

  • Mr Fish@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    Based on the way you’ve worded this, I’d say the best advice is don’t try to talk to women, just talk to people. Find people who share a common interest with you, and just hang out with them doing what you enjoy. Just live your life, and the talking to women part will happen naturally at some point.

    • Canaconda@lemmy.ca
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      2 months ago

      My advice for anyone that wants a loving relationship is to expand your social circles. Spending time with friends, meeting their friends, and making new friends. Join a hobby club or a team sport. The person you meet through friends, who you already have commonalities with, is probably gonna be more compatible with you than the person you matched on tinder for superficial reasons.

      • proudblond@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        Also, if you have good friends, they may intentionally introduce you to people they think would be a good fit for you.

        • Canaconda@lemmy.ca
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          2 months ago

          This. Surround yourself with good people and your life will be better in general.

  • Arkouda@lemmy.ca
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    2 months ago

    Stop trying to put yourself “around more Women” and make yourself a person Women want to be around instead.

    The best thing you can do is get a hobby, get involved in that hobbies local community, and meet people with similar interests. Romantic interests will eventually follow.

    • Canaconda@lemmy.ca
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      2 months ago

      Events in general because you all have at least 1 thing in common you can talk about (the event).

      Also you need a reason to be there other than meeting women or tldr you’ll give off ick vibes. It’s like the desperate salesman who drives away customers.

      Someone who’s genuinely there to have fun will be much more attractive in general.

  • Vanth@reddthat.com
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    2 months ago

    Meeting through friends and social groups like sports, clubs, church, whatever, is much better than cold approaches, IMO. I can see a dude display they have social skills and we both have something more than “he/she is pretty” to go on.

    Don’t have friends and hobbies? Tackle that before worrying about dating. Romantic relationships are like friendships but on expert mode.

    Counter-question, how can I make it clear I DO NOT want to be cold-approached by ANYONE while at the beach? Headphones, sunglasses, and my face in a book has not worked.

    • ryannathans@aussie.zone
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      2 months ago

      Put a sign up lol, otherwise if you’re in public expect people around to try to converse with you. Many people love talking to everyone around them. Everyone has their head buried in their phone or is engrossed in listening to music, etc. as a distraction from the daily grind or whatever their problem of the day is, it’s not always the obvious “don’t talk to me” that you might think

    • TheRealKuni@lemmy.world
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      2 months ago

      Counter-question, how can I make it clear I DO NOT want to be cold-approached by ANYONE while at the beach? Headphones, sunglasses, and my face in a book has not worked.

      Have you considered not being attractive? Always worked well for me.

  • snooggums@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    I always hung out with people who had parties that included men and women, and sometimes people would introduce people who they thought might be compatible. It didn’t usually work out, but sometimes those people with introduce others and so on. Just hanging out without any kind of interest in dating is great because more people get to know you and you get experience being around women and not making it about dating.

    I once was introduced to someone who didn’t really match, but she then introduced me to one of her friends and that worked out pretty well. My wife was introduced to me by a friend who dated her for a week in high school and they were still friends.

    Knowing someone who knows someone is a great shortcut to opportunities for meeting new people.

  • rc__buggy@sh.itjust.works
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    2 months ago

    Doing the shit you already like to do. Do you bike, hike, run, or ski/snowboard? I meet people all the time doing that stuff and I already have a wonderful partner.

    If you’re a drinker, meeting people at the bar is probably the best bet but anything you like to do, just go do it. Women are probably there.

  • Cuberoot@lemmynsfw.com
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    2 months ago

    Live to be 80 and retire to an assisted living apartment. The slight differences in life expectancy really show up at the back end. My grandpa spent a year as the only man on his floor and got all the geriatric pussy he could handle. Plus, since he was nearly blind from macular degeneration, he imagined them all as beautiful.

    Take care of your health, and good luck with the ladies!

  • burgerpocalyse@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    i dont like being in large groups of people or going out so so usually dating advice sounds to me like “stop being you”

  • chemicalprophet@slrpnk.net
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    2 months ago

    Are you doing all the important shit like bathing and working on yourself? I feel this gets overlooked a lot.

  • Libb@piefed.social
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    2 months ago

    Besides bars and clubs, how does a guy put himself around more women?

    Hobbies should be a good starting point. With a caveat.

    I’m into sketching/watercolors and I can tell you I constantly meet people (women and men) that are into the same hobby.

    We can meet by accident at the art store, or at gatherings, expo (or class), or by just being on the same spot at the same time painting the same thing (I live in Paris, we have many nice spots for painters). More often than not, these women are quite happy to spend some time sharing a genuine common interest without constantly having to worry about anything happening.

    Because, as far as I’m concerned, and that’s the caveat I mentioned, I don’t expect anything else to happen when I meet someone who is into the some hobby as I am. I don’t do that to meet women (or men). I do that because I enjoy sketching and watercolors (like I enjoy playing chess) and I don’t give a fuck about women being there or not. But I’m also always happy to meet someone interesting. I don’t know if this makes sense? It kinda makes sense to me ;)

    And btw, through that common hobby, I meet women (and men) from all age and from all conditions. Not just 50+ old farts (like I’m) but also quite many that are barely in their 20s, or even less. And barely any of them were drunk… so far :p

    edit: typos

  • Onomatopoeia@lemmy.cafe
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    2 months ago

    Meet people doing the things you like to do - at a minimum these people like something you like.

    Rock climber?

    Slam poetry?

    Break dance?

    Etc.